Kyman/Quotes

Season 1

 * Stan – “Mom and dad are home. My house is a disaster! Y-you guys gotta help me.”
 * Cartman – “I ain't helping crap. I wanna eat some pie.”
 * Stan – “You can't just leave me here alone!”
 * Cartman – “Oh yeah? Watch me.”
 * Kyle – “Yeah, Stan. We have to go find out if Cartman's pig is pregnant or not. See ya!”
 * — 1x05, 'An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig'

Season 5
"Kyle, this is Cartman. He's my sorta friend-ish."

- Kyle explaining Cartman to cousin Kyle, 5x10 'The Entity'

Season 14
"You saved my life, Kyle. Deep down inside you're a monster. (pinches his cheek) But you're my little monster!"

- Cartman to Kyle, 14x09 'It's a Jersey Thing'

Season 16
"Kyle, I love you babe. You can run all you want, try to pretend you like girls, but damn it, when we kiss there is magic! Don't let it go, Kyle. I want to hold you every morning and love you every night, Kyle. I promise you nothing but love and happiness. (singing) I sweeear, by the moon and the stars in the sky, I'll be there, Kyle. I sweeaaar, like the shadow that's by your side, Kyle, I swear to God I'll be there. For better or worse till death do us part. I'll love you with every gay beat of my heart. I swear, Kyle."

- 16x07 'Cartman Finds Love'

South Park: Fractured but Whole
"Ugh, it's always fucking Cartman."

- Kyle complaining to the new kid after Mitch Connor, Cartman's 'alter ego', kidnapped their parents

"Sorry Cartman kidnapped your parents. He's such a fucking dick sometimes."

- Kyle complaining to the new kid after Mitch Connor, Cartman's 'alter ego', kidnapped their parents