Ineffable Descendants

Ineffable Descendants is the het ship between Newton Pulsifer and Anathema Device from the Good Omens fandom.

Canon
Newt and Anathema are the descendants of Witchfinder Thou-Shall-Not-Commit-Adultery Pulsifer and Agnes Nutter, Witch respectively. Their ancestors hated each other and Pulsifer sentenced Agnes to be burned alive, with her tricking the puritans by smuggling gunpowder in her dress and blowing up most of her village. While Newt had absolutely no idea of his heritage, Anathema was very proud of it, keeping Agnes’ prophecies as a family heirloom.

Out of sheer coincidence, largely due to his lack of skills to become an engineer, Newton also ended up becoming a witchfinder in the present, needing the money. Largely unsuccessful in finding any witches, his general received a tip that the Antichrist is currently residing in Tadfield from Aziraphale, so he sends Newt to investigate. Unfortunately, Newt ends up in a car accident shortly after arriving in Tadfield and the Them (Antichrist Adam Young and his friends) rescued him, bringing him to Jasmine Cottage, current home of Anathema Device, the only adult they trust.

Anathema was already prepared to nurse Newt back to health, having already read that a descendant of Pulsifer will one day show up injured at her door and that she will end up falling in love with him. Seeing Newt for the first time left less of a great impression on her, she expected someone “Tall, Dark and Handsome”, but only got Tall and Dark. She shrugged and said to herself that “two out of three isn’t bad”.

Upon waking up, Newt was rather confused about being in a stranger’s bedroom, but seeing Anathema convinced him that he was in good hands. However, he also was initially skeptical of her appearance, but quickly brushed these concerns aside, figuring that he was never close to a woman before.

After Newt somewhat recovered from his accident, they got into a talk about Agnes Nutter’s prophecies, Newt was critical of her actions, but Anathema defended her, showing him that her prophecies are always accurate. Questioning her prophesied End of the World, Newt asks Anathema how much time they had left, she responds with about six hours. Figuring that they were destined to meet, they thus promptly have sex right as the Apocalypse was about to begin and the Cottage started falling apart.

Right afterwards, Anathema goes to the bath and tells Newt to take a shower, they had places to be. They quickly figured out that the Apocalypse will take place in the nearby airbase and make their way there. Arriving there, Anathema impresses Newt with her connections, simply convincing the soldier at the gate to let them through. Spying on the Four Horsepeople and seeing them set a virus into the airbase’s computers to set off every countries weapons at once, Newt and Anathema scram to find out how they could foil their plans and save the world. Newt then decided to put his “curse” that makes him unable to use computers to good use. The airbase’s computers end up crashing because of him and Anathema congratulates him.

Then quickly moving out to witness the Them defeating the Four Horsepeople, the debate between Metatron/Gabriel and Beelzebub and Adam pulverizing Lucifer, all of the humans decide to go home. After that night, Newt wakes up with Anathema next to him in Jasmine Cottage, her having lost her ancestors prophecies in Crowley’s burnt Bentley and only receiving the cover. After spending her entire life following her ancestor’s prophecies to the word, she was now left with nothing to guide her.

Newt tries to remember the details of what happened the day before. Though his thought process was interrupted by the arrival of a 300-year-old package addressed to “Mr. and Mrs. Pulsifer”, even though he isn’t married. Seeing Anathema arrive in the living room, she asked about the package. As they open it, they find further Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch. Anathema already deciding to read the first page, but Newt closed the book with one hand and asked her if she really wants to be a descendant for the rest of her life.

Their very last scene has them burning the rest of the prophecies, with Anathema leaning into Newt.

Fanon
Ineffable Descendants is the most popular ship for both characters, the fourth most popular ship for the "Good Omens (TV)" tag and the third most popular for the "Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett" tag.

The ship has something of an obscure popularity, despite not ranking very far from Ineffable Husbands, it is often considered a rarepair. This is largely because of the ship being hardly talked about in social media, largely due to many criticizing the pacing of their relationship, with many claiming that they are already in a relationship after barely a day of meeting each other. Fans often say that their chemistry worked much better on paper than on screen, though the complaints about the speed of their relationship largely remain.

Ultimately, Ineffable Descendants largely exists as a side-ship to Ineffable Husbands, much like every other Good Omens ship that doesn't involve Aziraphale and/or Crowley.

Fandom
FAN FICTION

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